I just dropped my camera. In fact I dropped my whole bag but the only thing that seemed to be effected was my camera. The newest addition to the camera lens family must’ve hit the ground at just the right angle, and as I picked up my camera I heard the dreaded tinkling of broken glass. Rushing inside I pried open the smushed in lens cap and saw what I’d suspected; the lens was history.
The tears came, I panicked, I got angry at myself, I texted a million apologies to my boyfriend (A); I imagined him getting super upset with me (he brought the lens and we share it), and thought of all the pictures I could no longer take with this lens. I scolded myself for not using my (more protective) camera bag, and for being so clumsy. “Why am I like this?,” I asked myself over and over, “I’m such a rubbish person,” my thoughts spiralled and I just felt worse and worse.
Until A replied, and he said “Don’t worry at all!! Don’t be silly, please don’t worry!,”. His lighthearted response shocked my mind to be quiet for a bit..he really didn’t think it was a big deal? Was I being ridiculous and over-reacting?
Now I’m rereading the top of this post again “In fact I dropped my whole bag but the only thing that seemed to be effected was my camera,”. In this bag I had my phone (which recently had its screen replaced..notice a pattern?), my iPad, wireless keyboard, and my camera. The ONLY thing that was damaged was the lens, everything else survived! I’ve always been a glass-half-empty type of gal, and when things go wrong find it easier to take it out on myself rather than look at the positives and feel grateful for what I do have. Rather than feel dismayed that my lens was broken, I could feel lucky that everything else was okay, and that I have other lenses I can use! I’m so grateful that my phone screen wasn’t smashed up again (cannot afford the ridiculous price for it to be replaced once more!), and my iPad is still functioning.
Camera lenses can be replaced, yes they’re expensive but I also have others I can use in the meantime. Objects only hold the meaning we put on them, and I’m choosing to let this one go. In fact, thank you camera lens for breaking and helping me learn to stop reacting to situations the way I do; it won’t happen overnight but the more I practice the easier it will get. This will not ruin my day, this will only serve me good feelings, of gratitude and thanks.
“It’s not what happens to you, but how you react to it that matters,”-Epictetus